Publically Yours ... ?

I think most people agree we have a health care problem in our country. The whole conversation around the healthcare legislation is exciting to me -- we may actually decide to implement a program that focuses on making sure people's basic needs are met. Queer people, especially, tend to be underinsured-- which means we go to the doctor less frequently and are more likely to catch serious illnesses in later stages when the prognosis is more likely to be grim.

So, as a queer person and activist, I'd really like to see results. And I am personally for a public option. And I wonder, will a federal health care plan be inclusive of gay and lesbian families? I can't claim to understand the complicated outlines I have read. What I do understand is they talk about "family" plans. And legally, according to the federal government, our families don't count.

The Gay Bomb

Come out! Come out! Whever you are!

12:05 Nuclia Waste / Queen

12:30 Aimee Herman

1:00 Something About Lulu

2:00 CYNOVA

3:00 Chasing Jenny

4:00 DJ Shannon & DJ Markie

BLOCK PARTY AFTER DARK Starts at 5pm!

6:15 Jill b / Solo Jazz Guitarist

7:00 - Till Close Back Room b-side Lounge (free Sushi) Rocky Mt Oysters DJ Shannon

DJ Earth

How we kill ourselves.

The Colorado Daily boldly claims the Houseman argument began after John announced he was gay. It's a catchy title, if a little misleading. According to the story, Traci Houseman was angry that her husband told a group of friends he was gay and walked home, finding him there when she returned. Supposedly he was angry that she left, they fought, the end result being his death by stabbing. According to a Denver Post article on August 3rd, John Houseman had a history of domestic violence, although no reported cases with Traci.

This story is about a human tragedy -- whatever the assignation of guilt. Traci will live forever with the loss of someone she loved. And John will not be coming back. This is also a story about the price of shame in our society. I'm not a person who likes to focus on the negative. I think queer folks in general are strong, stronger than your average person, often because they have to be. That doesn't mean that some of us don't break. Shame and repression can lead to physical and mental health issues. Our community uses tobacco and other substances at a higher rate than the "norm". And domestic violence is more possible in families that are already hiding who they are or what they want.

This story is about the work we do at Boulder Pride. The work you do when you can claim your whole self without shame. This story is about the importance of creating a Boulder County where people can safely and honestly embrace themselves.

My heart is with the Houseman family and friends. My heart is with everyone else who faces these kinds of challenges.

Queerty options?

I love the diversity of opinions in our community. One site that often gets me thinking is the Queerty blog. Aside from the ever engaging use of a pun as the title of the blog, the blog covers a variety of topics with some interesting perspectives.

How do I know what color my gender is?

If you don't read my Facebook, then you may have missed the sea of pink story I linked to yesterday. It's activism at its purest and it's inspiring to see people really understanding the meaning of community organizing.  And it's kind of wild to see the strong reaction the color pink elicits.

My current Mother Jones has an article about the evolution of pink in American culture and the gender coding of boys and girls. You won't be surprised that in our money motivated society, profit is a large reason for the insistence on dressing boys and girls in distinct colors when they are quite young. Before the early part of the last century, boys and girls wore the same clothes (often dresses) until they were 5 or 6. (I have some yellowing photos of my grandfather in an adorable white and lacy dress when he was around 5 years old.) Once clothing manufacturers realized they could sell families with different gendered children separate wardrobes, there was no turning back. Of course, initially pink was considered the better choice as it was a "more decided and strong colour" while blue was considered "delicate and dainty" and therefore more appropriate for the girl.

So I think my gender color is ... rainbow. What's yours?

The right to what?

It's funny because my passion for my work is about equality and fairness, so in a lot of ways that is what I am fighting for. Queer rights. Equal rights. And yet ... love isn't a right. It's rarely equal. And it's almost never fair. We don't have the right to love someone or be loved. We have (hopefully) the opportunity. My partner and I went and saw 500 Days of Summer. My friend is a movie reviewer and he rarely gives movies an "A" so I felt compelled. The story is a familiar one, what happens when you are more into someone than they are into you? It happens in love, in friendship, in business ... and it almost always stinks. But we keep trying and reaching, even when it doesn't quite work out the way we hoped. Primarily because fair is over-rated when it means we will miss out on something amazing.

I truly believe love is a gift we give ourselves (I know, sappy). The chance to become something more by reaching out beyond the confines of our own reality and experiences. The motivation to care more about other people's experiences and needs than our own. So I am fighting for our right to be equally involved in loving relationships --- whether they are equal or fair -- and have our gifts honored, whatever the gender of the person with whom we share them.